The Senility Prayer
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones that I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now that I'm older ( but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered.
1- I started out with nothing, and still have most of it.
2- I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.
3-Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.
4-All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.
5-If it is not lost, where is it.
6-It is easier to get older than it is to get older.
7-Some days you're the dog; some days you are the hydrant.
8-I wish the buck stopped here; I could use a few.
9-It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
10-The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom
11-If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.
12-When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?
13-It 's not hard to meet expenses,, they are everywhere.
14-The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
15-These day, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter, I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.
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